In the Margins
by LadyLorena
Summary: Loki's deception on the throne is revealed and an old friend seeks permission to visit him in the dungeon.
1. Chapter 1

It had only been a few years since Malekith's attack when Thor discovered somethin rotten in the realm of Asgard. He came home unexpectedly and unnannounced. He told no one of his arrival. He sought out his father and did not find him in his chambers, so he went to the sleeping room.

It was locked.

The sleeping room was never locked.

And this was when an inkling of something being not-right had entered Thor's mind. He did not know why he felt this way, but his intuition for trouble had been fairly well honed growing up with Loki. He shoved on the door and it did not budge. This was not good. The sleeping room was usually guarded by sentries because if something went horribly wrong, someone had to be able to wake Odin. Only Frigga had known the means to wake him, but after Loki's departure from Asgard, Odin had trusted Thor with this knowlege as well. Just in case.

Thor took one single swing at the door with Mjolnir and it crumpled. The room was dim. Only a faint glow eminated from the sarcaphogus at the centre of the room. It should have been glowing brightly. Thor lit the torch by the door and discovered there was a lid over it. He cautiously examined this lid, walking around the perimeter, looking for signs of trouble.

There was a large amount of blood on one side that had dried dripping down the corner of the stone. He prepared himself for the worst and heaved the lid away. The golden light was blinding in the dim and he extinguished his torch. The All-Father appeared alive. Thor whispered the awakening words, knowing that the one on the throne was the imposter.

Then all hell broke loose.

As Odin strode to the throne room, his armies joined him. Thor's presence added legitimacy to this being the real Odin. He announced his intention to remove the imposter alive and reveal him publicly. And that is exactly what he did, Loki stripped of his disguise during the evening festival in the city square.

To those who did not live in the palace, Loki had simply disappeared after the accident with the Bifrost years ago. They did not know the malfunction was not a malfunction at all, and they did not know about New York. They did not know he had been returned in chains and then left in the dungeon to remain there, freed only by Thor's need for vengeance. They did not know of his false death on Svartalfheim. He had vanished. This was unusual, but he had been sequestered for years on a project of some scholarly importance many years before, so it had not seemed too odd and the throne had not sought to issue any statement to confirm or deny this belief.

When he was publicly revealed, the realm went into shock. Odin had been a little different the past few years, but not in a bad way. There had been more leniencey on some things, such as talking poorly of the throne and on youth defacing monuments of the royal family. The throne had been largely quiet, the citizenry left alone to live their lives without its interference. Most people had been fairly happy and the realm had prospered under the few reforms that had been put in place to facilitate more fair trade and fair labour, as well as the measures to create better lives for non-native born citizens who had sworn fealty to the realm. The difference in the king had been a willingness to change.

Odin's first reaction had been to declare every new law and policy created during his absence null and void, but his first day after doing so, hundreds of Aesir and citizens of Asgard lined up outside the palace gates seeking an audience. They all spoke of how the new laws had changed life for the better and he decided to let them stand. Loki, it seems, had listened to some of his lessons more closely than he had thought, and had built upon them.

One brave man dared to tell him, "Might as he was a traitor, your Highness, he wasn't a bad king. In some ways, he was even a good one. He sure had us fooled, he did such a right well job of being yourself, Sir."

After the third day of audiences, these mostly thanking him for reinstating Loki's laws creating a more equitable Asgard, he sent everyone away and did some thinking.

A soldier approached him, "One of the women won't leave, All-Father. She says you ought to know her family."

"Oh? Did she send proof of this claim?"

"She sends this." He handed Odin a scrap of fabric with an ancient insignia on it, "Says it belonged to her grandfather."

Odin studied it for a moment and let old memories float to the surface, "Send her in."

Not long after, a red-haired young woman knelt before the throne, "All-Father. Thank you for granting this audience. I only just heard."

"Heard what?"

"That Loki sat here in your place. I was in the counrty with my cousins."

"Your family was once quite prominent. Your grandfather fought with my father against Svartalfheim many years ago." He handed her back the insignia.

"Yes. But those battles are long forgotten and we have fallen to obscurity. Our families crossed paths more recently. I often studied alongside Loki when you sent him to the temple to learn from the manuscript illuminators."

"So you come to me about him."

"Yes. We were once friends. If possible, I would like to visit him at least once. Even a condemned man ought to know his friends still think of him."

"Perhaps. I will send for you once I decide."

She rose, then bowed deeply, "Thank you, All-Father."

"Before you leave- your name?"

"Iris."

"Go, Iris, and wait for my messenger."

She bowed again and left.

Odin returned to his chambers to think.


	2. Chapter 2

When Iris was first escorted to the dungeon, the sounds of the prisoners made her horribly uncomfortable. Screams from some, grunts from others as they saw a woman for the first time in years, and catcalls that resulted in thuds and yelling. She had draped herself in a long shawl to hide, but it did not help. She sat down on a block-and-board bench in front of Loki's cell and waited a moment before clearing her throat. He was sitting at a plain desk with a book, his cot on the opposite wall.

"If you are attempting to get my attention, you will not get it. I do not wish to have visitors."

"That is odd, because it appears that since you answered, I already have it. And like it or not, you have one."

"Then go away so I might reclaim my peace."

"For the Loki I knew to eschew attention there must truly be important matters at hand...or possibly a very beautiful illuminated work with obscene marginalia."

He looked up, "The Loki you knew is dead. Though I do still laugh at the one you with the goat and the monk."

"Dead? Then I ought to go so I might properly mourn. There are rituals to follow and candles to light." She shifted forward as though to stand.

"Wait."

"Oh? For what?"

"A memory. Skipping studies to sit on the roof of the temple in the spring sun with our lunch."

"That was fun."

"Yes, Iris, it was."

"So you do remember my name."

"Of course. You were once a friend."

"I hope I still might be."

"And what will your family say if they learn you are visiting the traitor in the dungeons?"

"They will ask when you are to be executed and bother me incessantly for news of the palace, which is precisely why I do not intend to tell them."

He almost smiled, "And that is the Iris I once knew. Nearly as bold as I. Likely more defiant."

"Most certainly more defiant. A woman in this world must be."

"Then more defiant indeed."

She knew she would likely offend him, "And I looked up to one of the most defiant women I had ever met to learn it. I am so sorry for your loss, my friend. She was a hero to so many."

His face hardened and he turned back to his book, "Goodbye, Iris."

"Goodbye, Loki. I will visit again later."

"There is no need."

Iris left quickly, trying to ignore the sounds.


	3. Chapter 3

A week later, Iris returned, "Good morning, Loki."

"I told you not to return," his nose was buried in a different book.

"Is that the volume with the man and the peculiar cheese on the final page?"

"Your memory is exceptional."

"I have studied it a few times since. And it amuses me."

"Why are you here?"

"Because I wish to be."

"But why?" There was a hint of genuine curiosity under the bitterness in his voice.

"I have never had cause to stop thinking of you as my friend. And you could use company."

"I took the throne by deception and force."

"And that is relevant in what way?"

"Most people would consider it a reason to stop calling someone their friend."

Iris shrugged and adjusted her shawl as guards passed with a prisoner who screamed obscenities at her, "How can you stand this?"

"You get used to the noise."

"I hardly believe that the young man who once scowled at monks for chanting while he was studying ancient maps would simply get used to the noise."

"As I said, that person is dead."

"And as I have indicated, I do not believe that."

"Then you are a fool."

"Perhaps, but I think I am at least a wise fool."

He closed his book and turned to face her, "Oh? And what wisdom will the fool impart today?"

"The wisdom of persistence and patience."

"Ah. Foolish endeavours."

"Only to those too hurried to see their value. And what do you have to hurry towards?"

"You are rather infuriating, Iris."

She smiled, "I know. And I enjoy it."

"As you always have."

"Quite the same as you. You always delighted in getting under my skin."

He smirked, "Should I attempt to do so again?"

"It would be nice if you would- it would bring back memories of pleasant times with my dear friend."

"Then I will not."

"Because he is dead."

"Yes."

"You are failing, then, as you are already irksome," she teased.

He was quiet and she wondered if she offended him, "I do miss our banter..."

"Then I will visit again so we might continue it."


	4. Chapter 4

Iris' visits became regular- every week she would appear for a few minutes and then return to her life. Their conversations went the same way each time, with very little personal information, a little reminiscing, and once in a while a little of the banter that they once so often enjoyed. It was a few months before he asked anything about her.

"So how is it you keep your family from knowing of your little visits? You said they would be quite irritating if they were to find out."

"I have one person I can trust. She knows I visit a friend. She does not know who, but she suspects."

"She?"

"Amarylis. My sister. You ought to remember her."

A flicker of a smile, "Oh yes, I remember. I remember quite a bit of Amarylis."

"Given how much of her you saw, I would think you might remember all of Amarylis rather intimately." She winked playfully and he tried to hide blush that crept up his cheeks.

"Ah...yes. And you are certain she will say nothing to the rest of your family?"

"She has trysts she would rather keep secret. I make sure they do not learn of them. She owes me the favour many times over."

"So you call in a debt."

"No. We simply do these things for one another. Siblings often do."

"Not always."

"No. But given I said nothing when I caught her... Well, _does_ she owes me."

"I suppose you were jealous," he needled, hoping to hear of a secret crush.

"Jealous? Perhaps a little. But more was I angry that you to stranded me in the manuscript library with experts on the text we were studying and no explanation. And after I returned, shocked, I had to explain to a group of celibate monks why you were unavailable."

"Oh that must have been delightful."

"You do remember what I did to you the following day, do you not?"

"Oh yes. Your entire selection of manuscripts were ones with marginalia featuring the male anatomy."

"It was a subtle hint that I knew what you were up to."

"Subtle?"

"For me. Among monks."

"And you chose to focus on those pages the longest."

"I could have been more direct. I could have asked you to, in great detail, explain just what it was that you were doing instead of studying the previous day."

"I could have managed such, had you so challenged me."

"In _explicit_ detail. I did consider it."

"And yet you did not."

"I had some respect for the monks."

"You do realise it is as cruel to remind a monk of what he chose to eschew as it is to remind a prisoner of something he will never again experience?"

She smirked and examined her nails in mock disinterest, "Oh, is that what I am doing?"

"You are insufferable, Iris."

"Would you expect me any other way?"

"No."

"And I now consider payback complete. You do remember that I was studying to enter the priesthood, do you not? Tempting me then with what I would never have was only as cruel."

Loki flinched, "Oh. I did not know... You were simply a fellow scholar. I do not think I ever stopped to consider why. Have you since entered that profession?"

She laughed, "Oh, how I wish I were still eligable. But life happened..."

"Tell me."

"No. You know the conditions on priests. You can figure this one out on your own between now and when we meet again." She rose, said her goodbye, and left.


	5. Chapter 5

Iris' next visit skipped a week and Loki found himself missing their conversation. Her company made the time more tolerable. He had requested one of his favourite manuscripts for her visit and was disappointed when she did not arrive.

In the middle of the following week, Iris appeared, her dress a little wrinkled, "I regret missing last week. There have been some...complications in my life."

"Would you care to regale me with the story? Perhaps a little of the messiness of life will make me grateful for my cage."

She stopped in the middle of sitting down and rose again, "No. I will not be the tragedy that makes you happy to be confined."

"Why are you leaving?"

"I am not your escapist fantasy. I am not a story. I am a very tired, very distraught woman and I will not listen to you diminish what I have been through these past weeks."

"Please, sit."

"No."

And she left.

Iris returned the next day and sat silently in front of his cell.

"Iris, what is happening?"

"Do you genuinely care about my life or would you rather do as we have been, keeping things carefully segregated so you do not have to feel anything for me and I can pretend that you hold our time together dear without the trappings of who we are now getting in the way?"

"When you missed a week, I discovered myself truly disappointed. Yesterday baffled me. It still does. I have pushed you and prodded for months and yet it was yesterday that you first left. What has happened?"

"An unwelcome reminder has returned to my life and will not leave."

"Unfortunately I cannot order anyone removed from anywhere from here. But why so dissheveled?"

"I fear I shall have no time to be any other way. I had to be far more clandestine in my getting here today. I am being followed."

"Followed?"

"Yes. By the reminder."

Loki crouched down in front of the barrier, "You speak cryptically. I do not understand what you mean."

"Do you know why I was disqualified from the priesthood?"

"I assume a lack of celibacy, but I do not know."

"I was taken by force. Think back and you will remember the change in my demeanor after it."

"You became so serious and refused to let me out of your sight shorly after Amarylis."

"She was not the reason. I did not want to be alone."

"Oh."

"He has reappeared. My parents know I was disqualified and they believe it was by my willingness. They do not know who. But they know his parents well and say it would be a good match."

He was horrified, "What can I do?"

"Nothing. But you are not the only one trapped at the moment."

"Will you return?"

"Yes. If I can find a way."

After she left, Loki felt a pang of regret for having put himself in prison.


	6. Chapter 6

Iris was unwillingly accompanied on her next visit. The guards at the gate admitted him to the outer courtyard, but those standing watch at the entrance to the palace did not.

"Iris, tell them I am your betrothed. They must let me in if they allow you."

"I'm sorry, sir, but entrance to the palace is strictly by permission of the king and you do not have it."

"But she belongs with me. I will not allow this visit if she is unaccompanied."

One guard said, "Then seek an audience with the All-Father in the proper manner."

"But do not anger him by denying him her presence," the other added.

"Oh, no, that certainly would not bode you well for gaining access to the palace."

"Most certainly not."

Iris bowed to them, "I do not wish to be late."

They let her pass and she left her betrothed staring after her. She knew he would tell her family that she was visiting the All-Father, her visits to the palace no longer be secret. She took some comfort knowing that who she was visiting would, at least, be misconstrued and only her sister would have an inkling of the lie.

Before her visit, she had an audience with Odin; she once again knelt, her head bowed, "All-Father, I come with a request."

"Oh? Have your conversations with the prisoner been fruitful?"

"Yes. He remembers much of our youth and his demeanor is now rather friendly when I visit."

"What is your request?"

"Would you consider someday allowing me to speak to him face to face, rather than with the barrier between us? He sits close to it now and I must look up to be at eye level with him when I settle on the bench. It would be nice, at least once in a while, to be able to sit beside him as old friends."

Odin wanted to believe Loki was not entirely wicked, but his anger was powerful. He thought for a moment before answering, carefully choosing his words.

"At this time, I believe he is too dangerous for such a visit. But I will consider your request and perhaps we may allow for such a thing at a later date."

"Thank you, your Highness."

"My guards tell me there was a slight disturbance at the gate."

"Do not grant him entrance. I beg of you."

"No? Who is he?"

"I am betrothed to him, but not willingly."

"Is that all?"

"No. There is a far darker history. I do not want him in this part of my life. I do not want him to disrupt my visits. I need him to think I am being summoned here."

"He will otherwise stop you."

"I would never leave his house."

"I will send for you each week."

"Thank you, All-Father."

He dismissed her and she walked the now-familiar hallways to the dungeons. Loki was reading, as usual, when she arrived.

"You are quiet today."

"Yes."

"Were your travels here unpleasant?"

"Entirely."

This brutal honesty was what he had come to expect over the months of visits, but it still was a bit disarming, "Oh. Praytell why?"

"Because my betrothed accompanied me."

"Oh." It was his turn for silence.

"I suppose I ought to get used to it. Though thankfully he was not permitted in the palace and the All-Father assured me he will send for me to allow us to continue our visits."

Loki crossed his cell and sat down beside the barrier, "I assure you it was not for my sake, but rather for yours, that he made this promise."

"And that would make you less grateful for it?"

"No. Your betrothed. The man you spoke of?"

"Yes."

"And will he be kind to you in marriage?"

"No. In nothing will I be willing."

"Ah. I am deeply sorry, Iris." He reached toward her, stopping short of the barrier, letting his hand drop. She tried to smile.

"Thank you. On a happier note, though, I asked the All-Father if I might some day sit beside you, rather than on the other side of this wall, and he said he would consider it."

"Do not hope. He likely will not."

"There is always the possibility he will someday consider you no longer a threat."

"I flung him against the sarcophogus in which he takes his Odinsleep and sealed him in it unconscious without a thought as to if he would survive. I do not think he will ever see me as anything but a violent creature."

"But why? For years we heard nothing of you. Then you are revealed to have somehow stolen the throne. I do not understand these things."

For the first time, Loki realised that all of Asgard did not know everything he had done, "Do you not know that I am not Odin's son by birth?"

"No."

"Are you surprised by this?"

"Of course. Why did you never tell me?"

"I did not know myself until shortly before the incident with the Bifrost."

"Oh. Was it a shock to learn such a thing?"

"Yes. Did you know it was I who aimed the Bifrost as a weapon?"

"No."

He smiled, a cruel edge to his voice, "Oh yes. I sought to destroy the realm I was adopted from. Did you ever suspect I was not Aesir?"

"No."

"Do you wish to guess what realm I am from? What realm I could hate so much as to turn the Bifrost on it?"

"No."

"Oh come now, please, do guess."

"I cannot."

"Would it crush you to discover I am from Jotunheim?"

"Oh."

"'Oh'? No screaming and wailing? Your friend is the monster from your childhood stories, the demon in the margins of your beloved illuminated manuscripts. All you can muster is 'oh'?"

Her voice wavered, "My friend has always been what he is. Difficult or no, it means I befriended a frost giant and held you close for years."

"What if I told you that I tried to kill your prince? Or that I set out to rule Midgard with an invading army? Or possibly that I feel utterly no remorse for these things?"

"Then I would call you a liar."

"For which?"

"Remorse. I have watched you agonise over an argument the morning after, questioning every word you said. I have watched you flinch as someone began speaking after you apologised, afriaid of their condemnation. You feel everything intensely and deeply. I cannot believe you have no regrets."

"Then you are a fool. That soft creature is dead. I killed eighty Midgardians in two days."

"Stop trying to make this more complicated. It will be hard enough to understand as it is."

"What is there to understand? I am a creature of hatred and vengeance."

Iris rose, "No. You are my friend, even if I do not understand you. Until we meet again. Which may not be next week if my parents decide I am to wed quickly."


	7. Chapter 7

Iris' visits skipped a week for her wedding, but then the throne sent a messenger and she resumed her visits.

She had been married for one miserable year when Odin granted her request for a closer visit. She was practically giddy as she descended the steps, but after rounding the corner, she stopped abruptly. He was being dragged to his cell. The guards dropped him just inside the door and left.

"Excuse me. The All-Father has said I can visit him in his own space."

"Oh. Right, miss. He's not going to be much good to you, but here you go."

He was slowly crawling towards his cot when she crouched beside him and offered him a hand, "Come. The cot might not be very comfortable, but it is better than the stone."

"A single hand will not help."

"Then lean on me. I am strong."

He struggled to get to his feet, but they made it to the cot; he stretched out, groaning softly, "I hate this time of year."

"What did they do to you?"

"The same they did last year. A gift on the anniversary of my taking the throne."

"So the day is painful in more ways than one."

"Oh?"

"You cannot lie and tell me the death of your mother does not sit on your heart as well."

He tried to bring up his arm to cover his eyes, a way to hide with little movement, but even that hurt too much and he resorted to staring at the ceiling.

"For once, be honest with yourself."

"Every year I focus on the beating instead so that I might pass the day without remembering."

"Would you like a hug?"

He said nothing, so she simply waited until he could no longer stand the silence, "Damn you, Iris...yes. I would." She bent down to embrace him, "Whatever will your husband think?"

"My husband will think the worst, of course. If he knows."

"Is he jealous?"

"Incredibly. And suspicious. And crazy."

"And yet he still allows your visits?"

"He does not dare stand against the summons of the All-Father."

"Ah. He yet rules with fear."

"Yes, but no more than you did. People were happy under your reign, and he has sought to keep that."

Loki was surprised, "To keep it?"

"Yes. Hundreds protested when he tried to revoke your trade laws and those granting rights to our non Aesir citizens. They turned out in droves to speak to the king, and not only those who most benefitted. Others spoke for them as well."

"So I did something well."

"Very well." He smiled, but she decided to risk saddening him again, "She would be proud of that."

"One good deed does not undo all the wickedness I have wrought. And I do not wish to speak of her."

"You cannot hide from it forever, Loki. It will only destroy you."

"I think I have done a fine job destroying myself. And if it is not obvious, I know I cannot hide forever- do you take me for an idiot? Shall I seek out the help of a councillor from my cell, or perhaps see if one of the other prisoners could help me chart a better course for my future?"

"Please, I am spoken to that way enough at home. Not here as well."

"That is not how the Iris I knew in our youth would have responded to such a jab."

"Then perhaps she is as dead as the Loki from our youth."

He tried to sit up and managed to prop himself up on his elbows, "She can't be."

"I once said the same of you and yet you did not believe me. So why not?"

"Because I need her to...to save me."

Iris turned away from him, "You will have to seek another saviour. I cannot rescue you from yourself. Only you can do that." She rose, "I will see you next week, though, all things willing."


	8. Chapter 8

When Iris arrived veiled the next week, Loki knew something was wrong and that the scheme he had concocted during the week was likely right.

"Tell me everything about your home life, down to the details- where you keep the linens, the dishes, and what housekeeping you do every day."

"Why?"

"Raise your veil."

"No."

"You are bruised, are you not? Battered and aching?"

"I do not wish to say."

"A sure admission if I have ever heard one. I am going to end this. You deserve better- how often must you travel veiled?"

"At least once a week."

"Even I am not beaten weekly."

"Or more."

"When a prisoner is treated better than a free woman, there is something terribly wrong that must be addressed."

"What are you going to do from in here?"

He created an illusion for those outside the cell- he was pacing while talking to Iris as she sat on the cot, "I won't be in here." Shielded from view of the guards, he shape-shifted into her, "A trade. You will be safe in here. I will return in a week."

She stared at him-as-her, "How can I be assured you will return?"

"I give you my word."

"Your word has meant little and you lie easily."

He wrote something down on a scrap of paper, "You will wear my skin until you say these words. If I do not return in a week, reveal yourself. They will know I have escaped and likely will execute me as soon as they find me."

"Why would you do this?"

"Because I believe my sanity depends on your company. You have changed, Iris. You once excelled in sarcastic and witty banter, yet now you flinch with its harshness. Your playful nature is muted. While mine may have been crushed from me, I shall not allow it to happen to yours."

"But why?"

"Because it is the right thing to do. Now brace yourself. I must disguise you as me."

"I will permit this, but if you break your word, you will deserve whatever they do to you." She closed her eyes and felt a dull burning tingle spread across her body as things moved into place. When she opened her eyes, she looked down at hands not her own, clothes not her own. "This is very strange," she said with a voice not her own.

"You may get used to it, you may not. I promise you we will switch places again as soon as possible. There is a good selection of manuscripts on my desk. Now, tell me about your life."

As he left, she wondered if it was true that his time in prison was less torment than her daily life. If so, the break was going to be a welcome relief.


	9. Chapter 9

Loki had dressed as a woman before, and having watched Iris' movements, he had little trouble imitating her. When he entered her house, he saw a man he assumed was her husband sitting at the table.

"You are late, woman."

"I had business to attend at the palace. You know I cannot dismiss a summons from the king."

"You can leave early. Your husband requires dinner on time."

"Somehow I do not think the All-Father would take kindly to such a request." He was a little more sarcastic than he intended.

"Do you mock me?"

Loki realised he was treading on thin ice, "No."

"I think you did. Get to dinner. We will deal with this after I am fed."

He went to the kitchen and put together a simple meal- despite being a prince, he had at least some idea as to how to cook.

"You call this dinner?"

"I am tired and I thought you would like a simple meal after a long day."

"You know what I want when I return home! Hearty food on the table, a wife smiling in the kitchen, and a night of relaxation. Why can you not do this? Why do I have to ask for things that other men's wives give gratefully?" His anger built and he flung the food on the floor. Loki kept himself in character, stepping back. "Well? Clean that up!"

While he was cleaning up, a boot landed in his stomach. Then another. And Loki wondered how Iris had not killed this man in his sleep. He decided things were going to end. The next time the boot tried to make contact, he grabbed it, yanked, and as Iris' husband hit the ground, he leapt onto his chest. With one good punch, the man's nose shattered.

"What the...?!" he gasped in surprise.

Loki returned to his own form and grinned- it was a wicked, vicious grin, "Oh, the fun I am going to have at your expense..."

"Get off me!"

"I think not. I wonder...how many times did she say as much and you simply ignored her cries and continued beating her until you were weary from the exertion and she could no longer protest or protect herself? Did you relish the sound of her sobs?"

"What?"

"Iris. Your wife. You do not deserve her."

"Are you banging her?"

Loki slammed his head into the floor, "No. And neither will you be. I intend to remove that possibility entirely." The man's eyes were wide as Loki shape shifted into the dungeon warden, "Oh yes, this will truly be a delight."


	10. Chapter 10

Iris relished the quiet. Loki had enchanted the cell to muffle the dungeon noises and she enjoyed every second in which the only thing she could clearly hear was the sound of the ancient pages she turned. As she read, she remembered all the reasons the priesthood had been so appealing to her- hours of nothing but manuscripts and her own mind, being surrounded by others excited by texts, the comforting routine of historic rituals, the opportunity to guide others through rites of passage, and a simple life without the pressures of marriage and family. As she studied, she greived the lost opportunity.

Loki also had a dampening spell around the house on that first day as he let anger and vengeance rule him, shifting shape frequently so as to keep his prey confused. That night, Iris' husband fled. Loki did not see him the rest of the week as he wore Iris' skin, lived quietly, and waited for the summons to the palace.

He entered the cell to find Iris had ordered more books from the library and was busy cross-referencing texts, pages of notes spilling onto the floor, "Hello, Iris."

"Oh, hello, Loki. I did not see you enter."

"You appear to have kept yourself busy."

"Are you ready to switch back?"

"Yes." The warm tingle evaporated from her body and she looked down at hands and clothes that were her own, "What did you do?"

"I frightened him so much that he fled on the first night and he has not yet returned. Shape shifting can be both a tool and a weapon against those of weak mind."

"What else did you do?"

He rested a hand on her shoulder, his voice gentle, "Hurt him as badly as he hurt you. If he dares touch you again, tell me. I will take care of it the same way."

"I hope it does not feed his anger. You seem more like my old friend every time I see you."

He gestured to the pages across the desk, "What have you been reading?"

"Everything. Did you know these books all relate? This one describes the processes that this one depends on to explain the fundamental workings of Yggdrasil as mythologised in this one. They all connect, even if it is not apparent at first."

He smiled as her eyes lit up, her words rapid, "You seem more like my old friend since I saw you last as well."

She rested her cheek against his fingers, still lightly on her shoulders, "I have so missed books, Loki. Words and thoughts, the flurry of new ideas that invade during sleep and cause one to light a candle and work in the middle of the night..."

"They are their own sort of magic, are they not?"

"Yes."

He hovered beside her, looking over her notes, "This is brilliant, Iris."

"Thank you. I read what you had written and it just seemed to fit."

"Will you come sit with me a moment?" They sat on the bed and he let silence settle over them before taking one of her hands, "I think I have found a bit of the old Loki. Many things have invaded my mind that I would rather not think about. But kindness is somewhere still a part of me. And I am protective in the same way Thor is of me. I am not sure I like drawing this parallel between the two of us, but given what I felt I had to do for you..."

"You did not kill my husband did you?"

"He deserved it, but no. I injured him, I taunted him, I spoke cruelly to him, but I did not kill him. You have my word that he ran off in the night and I did not see him for the rest of my time in your place."

"I told you before that the old Loki is not dead. You only had to believe me."

"Perhaps a part of me did, and hence why I found him. Me."

"You will never again leave this cell, will you?"

"No. Not unless you grant it."

"Heimdall will know, will he not?"

She watched the wheels turn in his mind, "He ought to have known this time. Why was I not captured? Why did he not tell Odin so I could be dragged back?"

She put her arms around him, "I do not know, but thank you. I am ever grateful for your kindness...and your manuscripts."

Loki smiled and held her gently, trying to remember the last person who had embraced him. There had been Thor as he lay dying in Svartalfheim, but that did not count. People were odd around death. Before, it had been his mother just after she thought he had saved her from Laufey. Iris tried to sit back, but Loki, lost in thought, held her tight and tried to stop the flooding thoughts. But nothing worked.

Iris had no idea what was goin on in his mind, but with his grasp desperate and his eyes squeezed closed, she knew better than to interrupt.

Then he started whispering, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me..."

"Loki?"

"I cannot..."

"You cannot what?"

"End this. Her voice, her touch, her grace, her gifts... She was the last to embrace me so..."

"Shall I stop? Would that help?"

But he was shaking his head before she stopped speaking, "No. Please, no." So she waited until he collected himself, "My apologies, Iris. I seem to have momentarily forgotten myself."

"I think you remembered yourself."

"The young man who overthought everything and wished for adventure and glory and obscene marginalia?"

"Yes. My dear friend."

"You were right, you know."

"Oh?"

"I feel remorse for some things. Not for others, but for some. I accept that it all led me here, though."

"You have always been a thinker."

"Too much of one."

"No. If you were not as you are, you would not have been so keen a scholar, nor your wit so sharp. And your mind is what I was drawn to." She sighed and sat back, fiddling with her dropped veil, "But I suppose my scholarly pursuits will come to an end again, won't they? You will have to tell me what you discover."

"But why should they? Speak to Odin. Perhaps you can stay another time, but without switching places. We could study together."

"He will think me crazy to wish to stay in the dungeons."

"He likely already does for visits."

"True." They sit uncomfortably for a moment, "He has to know what we did...but why did he not stop you from leaving?"

At that, the barrier dropped and they both startled as Odin stepped in, "Because I decided to let it be a test."

Loki scrambled to his feet and offered Iris a hand as she rose, "Sir, I can explain everything. Iris was being-"

Odin held up his hand, "You have been well watched. I know of her husband. He has spent the week cowering in pubs. You surprised me, boy. I thought you would take advantage of her tragedy to secure your freedom, leaving her to suffer in your place. That you did not says much of your character."

"Do your observations tell you I still cannot forgive you? That I did not care if you were dead or living when I sealed you in the sarcophogus? Does the all-seeing eye read my distain?" Every word dripped bitterness.

"He would have to be deaf and blind not to," Iris quipped.

"You do not get to diminish my rage."

"I do not intend to. But ask an obvious question...well, what do you think I am going to say?"

"Perhaps nothing?"

"And just when have I ever done that? Really, Loki, come now."

Odin watched the exchange, amused, "Some things never change. And some things I hope will. But that is not what I came to discuss. Heimdall watched your every move. You lived quietly for a week and never left her house. You returned willingly. You have shown concern for Iris beyond what I thought you capable of. I am willing to change the terms of your confinement on one condition."

"You wish a sacrifice? Grovelling? More of my blood than is shed yearly? Or perhaps you wish tears I am unwilling to shed."

"No. I want your studies to result in scholarly works or documents of interest to the priests." He addressed Iris, "You were studying for the priesthood, were you not? You spent this past week reading and noting as though you had."

"Yes, your Highness, I did."

"And did you enter that profession?"

"No."

"You still have a habit for it, though? Why did you stop if you still enjoy the work?"

"It was not by my choice, Sir. But yes, I love the work."

"I cannot change the way the priests manage their company, but I can grant you time and space to work alongside Loki. This cell, however, is not suited to proper studies. Loki, you will be returned to your quarters under heavy guard. It will be cleared of all questionable content in advance. If you find something missing you need, you may ask, but I may not grant it back to you. If this is agreeable to you both..."

Loki spoke to Iris, "I could be incredibly disagreeable and decline solely out of spite, but if you wish to continue your studies, I will hold my tongue and instead agree with only a little bite to my words."

"I would like to ask to modify the bargain only a little."

Odin thought he ought to be offended at the suggestion that his already generous offer was not enough, but was instead more than a little curious, "Oh? What do you propose?"

"That I leave my husband's house and bring what few posessions I have here to share in Loki's confinement so I might practice the same monastic life that I yearned for when I began my studies."

"Iris, you have done nothing to deserve to share my imprisonment. What of Amarylis? Will she not miss you?"

"She will understand that I am following a dream. So long as she and I can visit one another on occasion, she will not be angered."

"We can arrange visits for your family. You may use the title 'royal scholar' to describe your station," Odin said.

"Then it is settled. I will gather my belongings, explain to my family what it is I am doing, and we shall begin." She was grinning broadly as she left the cell.

Once alone, Odin and Loki stood staring awkwardly at one another until Loki asked, "Will the beatings cease? Or ought I continue to look forward to the annual tradition?"

"They will stop."

"I...I do have regrets. You must have heard. Or seen."

"Saw. I have frequently watched you and Iris. Though that means I did also hear."

"I am also still very bitterly angry."

"I can tell."

"And what of you? Do you still wish me gone? Do you still believe it was my birthright to die and that you ought to have let me do so? Come now, I do so long to hear the answers I know already."

"Your mother once said you were so perceptive of everyone but yourself and she was right. I do not know what to do with you, Loki. I made my choices. I brought you here. And you made your choices and they brought you here."

"You are being infuriatingly patient."

"I cannot make it easy for you to be insolent. Now gather your pages and your books. You will, no doubt, want to have things in order before Iris returns."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because she was right when she told me that even a condemned man ought to know his friends still think of him. And I have not seen you so protective of a friend in many years. And she is a brilliant scholar, as are you."

"How did you never notice that she was quite dear to me once? I am certain I came home from my studies often speaking only of Iris and nothing of what we were supposed to be studying."

"It is easy to be blinded by things in your way when you have only one eye."

"Clever."

"There is work to be done, Loki. If you do not want the guards gathering up your pages, get to it yourself. I must be off to make safe your chambers." Odin left.

Loki walked to the desk and crouched down to try to discern some sort of order to the scattered paper. He was terrified of what Odin might ask of him in the future in return, but at the same time, there was Iris. Delightfully witty, acid-tongued Iris who loved manuscripts and ancient marginalia and who would be living with him, studying with him, and laughing with him for however long their arrangement lasted. As he skimmed her notes in a handwriting that was halfway between his and hers, he could not help but be amazed at the connections she made. He hoped they would be together for a very long time.


End file.
